If I were a rich girl, I would buy a big ass house. In Hawaii.

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NO “TELEPHONES”. TALK TO EACH OTHER. FACE TO FACE ONLY. WRITE A LETTER. SEND A TELEGRAM TO YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 1860. LIVE.

NO ‘WRITING’… TALK TO EACH OTHER. THROW A ROCK AT YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 10,000 BCE.  LIVE.

URGGA. ROU GRAAURH. RUH.
<SMACKS HANDS ON WALL WITH PAINT.>

NO ‘HIGHER BRAIN FUNCTIONS’ …USE YOUR REPTILIAN BRAIN
EAT YOUR MOM’S CORPSE SHE DIED TO PROVIDE YOU WITH SUSTENANCE
PRETEND YOU HAVE JUST AROSE FROM THE SEA
SURVIVE

NO “MULTICELLULAR TRAITS”….. USE YOUR SYMBIOTIC MITOCHONDRIA
REPRODUCE ASEXUALLY, YOU’RE YOUR OWN PARENT
PRETEND IT’S 2BYA
EVOLVE

NO “LIFE.” USE FUNDAMENTAL PHYSICAL FORCES TO FORM SPHERICAL OBJECTS REVOLVING AROUND ONE ANOTHER IN SPACE. 
FUSE HYDROGEN INTO HELIUM USING GRAVITATIONAL PRESSURE TO PRODUCE HEAT AND LIGHT. 
PRETEND IT’S 4.5BYA.
STABILIZE INTO EQUILIBRIA

NO “MATTER”.  EXIST IN THE VOID WITHOUT PURPOSE OR MEANING.
THERE IS NO “YOU”, ONLY THE VAST CONCEPT OF NOTHING.
TIME DOES NOT EXIST.
BE.

Woah.

NO “TELEPHONES”. TALK TO EACH OTHER. FACE TO FACE ONLY. WRITE A LETTER. SEND A TELEGRAM TO YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 1860. LIVE.

NO ‘WRITING’… TALK TO EACH OTHER. THROW A ROCK AT YOUR MOM. PRETEND IT’S 10,000 BCE.  LIVE.

URGGA. ROU GRAAURH. RUH.

<SMACKS HANDS ON WALL WITH PAINT.>

NO ‘HIGHER BRAIN FUNCTIONS’ …USE YOUR REPTILIAN BRAIN

EAT YOUR MOM’S CORPSE SHE DIED TO PROVIDE YOU WITH SUSTENANCE

PRETEND YOU HAVE JUST AROSE FROM THE SEA

SURVIVE

NO “MULTICELLULAR TRAITS”….. USE YOUR SYMBIOTIC MITOCHONDRIA

REPRODUCE ASEXUALLY, YOU’RE YOUR OWN PARENT

PRETEND IT’S 2BYA

EVOLVE

NO “LIFE.” USE FUNDAMENTAL PHYSICAL FORCES TO FORM SPHERICAL OBJECTS REVOLVING AROUND ONE ANOTHER IN SPACE. 

FUSE HYDROGEN INTO HELIUM USING GRAVITATIONAL PRESSURE TO PRODUCE HEAT AND LIGHT. 

PRETEND IT’S 4.5BYA.

STABILIZE INTO EQUILIBRIA

NO “MATTER”.  EXIST IN THE VOID WITHOUT PURPOSE OR MEANING.

THERE IS NO “YOU”, ONLY THE VAST CONCEPT OF NOTHING.

TIME DOES NOT EXIST.

BE.

Woah.

(Source: agirlandhisplatypus)

(Source: primegifs)

isaia:

samati:

skeletales:

This is unexpectedly not about make-up haha

reblogged before it was even finished.

SUPREME 

straightdating:

charybdiss:

Please watch this I’m in tears

THIS IS A COMMERCIAL I’M LAUGHING

*fills mason jar with vodka* i’m doing a cleanse

(Source: zodiacbaby)

hobbits-elfboots-and-trenchcoats:

221no:

interbvtts:

i love everything about this post

i have never reblogged anything so fast 

(Source: skoomapipe)

dinoduckqueen:

wiredandrewired:

dudeistlibertarian:

espeonsilverfire2:

findingschmomo:

browncoat-named-cauthon:

excitabletortoise:

god bless america

I hope this the last remaining photos of our presidents

Is no one going to talk about Ronald McDonald fighting in Clinton’s background.

I’m not even american and I will reblog these anyday.

is Teddy Roosevelt shooting Bigfoot?

That one is historically accurate, actually.

I am American and I can confirm these are all 100% real photos

(Source: 8bitmonkey)

demonic-lionfish:

milliondollarnigga:

magnacarterholygrail:

jayjsupremacy:

phenomenarwhal:

~~~~~~~SIGNAL BOOST!!!~~~~~~~~

For anyone who is facing a mountain of debt after they graduate check out this amazing idea:

"SponsorChange has created a mutually-beneficial initiative that provides people power for high-impact non-profits in need, while simultaneously helping to relieve students of their ever-impending debt."

check out this link for more info —->

http://www.bust.com/be-a-good-human-and-get-your-student-loans-paid-off.html#.U1gA3fldWSr

THANK YOU GOD

WELL THEN

SWEET MOTHER OF FUCK MY LIFE IS SAVED HOLY SHIT ON A CRACKER FUCK ME SIDEWAYS

coolscar:

Do not trust people like me. I’ll take you to museums, and then steal the Declaration of Independence